I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
My liver is preforming stress tests.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize