Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
