Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
