So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
