like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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