3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
