i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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