we're blogging at a bar
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
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