just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
The air taste purple.
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