so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Randomize