is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
