operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
