Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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