I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I just blew my weed a kiss
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
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