Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize
