The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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