its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
