So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
