We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize