And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
