i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
