Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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