I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
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