Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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