Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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