try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
