So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
