kristin has been a bad kristin
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
