just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
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