Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize