I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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