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After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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