Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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