hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
