at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize