so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
