I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
