Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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