So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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