i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
