Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
