So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
