Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
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