you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
