There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
