My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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