hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Houston, we have a blender
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize