Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
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