Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
foreskin is a definite game changer
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Randomize
