The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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