Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
