Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I cockslap morals
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Randomize