It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
In America we eat man semen.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Randomize