it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
